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Calm In the Eye of the Storm

Growing up, I never liked being at my house. I felt trapped and that I had no control. Throughout my teenage years, I was always out of the house. When a hurricane passed through, I would have to stay longer than I would have typically liked. It was not so bad when my father did not live with us, eventually he did move back in.

I only could endure hurricanes because Tizzy, my childhood dog that passed away in March 2020, and I both kept each other company in our anxiety. Tizzy did not like thunder, and I did not like the wind. My father was insensitive to any of our anxieties. Even going as far to command my mother to drive him to a gas station in the middle of a hurricane to get more alcohol because of his alcoholism; An event that showcased his abuse and general malign behavior towards my mother.

Before we adopted Tizzy, I used an Astro Boy figure as emotional support. This Astro Boy did not have his hand, so he had a very versatile bobby pin instead. During hurricane Katrina, Astro Boy kept me company along with a Teen Titan’s Robin action figure whose head could not stay on.

Tizzy’s gone, and I still do not like hurricanes. The wind puts so much stress on the second story of our house that it creaks. It sounds like it is so close to snapping in two like a toothpick. While I do not like hurricanes, I can still find positives about the situation.

While people have been filling bags with sand and stocking up on hurricane supplies; I have been reflecting on ways I might cope this hurricane season without Tizzy. I am currently working on a new blog post about my journey with therapy and my depression. Writing is a great distraction and helps me be more present with myself. I have stocked up on a few books, games, and podcasts to consume.

While I might be feeling anxious about the storm, I cannot imagine how the people over on the East Coast of Florida might be feeling right now. With only a little time passing from the tragedy of the Surfside Condo collapse, the uncertainty they must be feeling as they still comb through the remains of the collapse and dealing with those repercussions. People could have to bury empty caskets once a storm washes away remains of passed away family members that have not been found in the wreckage. Slowly coming off the pandemic and re-transitioning to a post-Covid society is already a monumental task. Having to deal with that, on top of ecological and bureaucratic fallout is… a lot.

My favorite part of a hurricane passing over Florida is the calm after the storm. The sense of unity that forms as we all try to pick up any loose pieces and put them back where they need to be. After the tumultuous year we all collectively had in 2020, we really could use more of that unity in 2021. Arguably, I also really like the eye of the storm. Something about the calm, peaceful aspect then immediately going back to a raging storm is comforting.

These are a few songs that are ‘hurricane related’ that I think of when I think of hurricanes:

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